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Thursday, October 14, 2004

The End - Photos & THE MOVIE

Our Friend - Interstate 95
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
Back home and Snappy Snaps are giving all staff overtime to print up Phillis's thousand rolls of film.

Meanwhile here's few photos. Click below

Also the Movie is being edited, for General Release next week, on this very site. Watch this space....

For Movie preview.
(It's only rough) THE MOVIE - TRAILER

Here's another hair-brained scheme. SOMETHING FOR THE WEEKEND?

Next Year's Tour.
Denver to Las Vegas. THERE"S GOLD IN THE HILLS

Monday, October 11, 2004

Part Twelve - Postscript - a new world record

A weakened man
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
The final day:
After 9 or 10 days of absolute magic!, somehow we manage to leave the luxury of the Hilton Milenium hotel, and head for the shops...this was done with huge hangovers and resembled something crossed between dawn of the dead and dawn of man, as we gradually recovered with each jean/pant/gadget shop.

If we thought the tour climax had been and gone...we were wrong.... it was yet to be delivered.... after a whole day and night of "encouragement" from friends n family, it was to be in the form of "Reight! am gunna do it",
Barnes mooed!....A quick cab uptown, 5th and 57th... I believe, to those in the know....that is the address of 'Tiffany's", not the 80's pop star but the jeweller's...
Two minutes later we were back in a cab, with a world record under our belts, The quickest sale Tiffany's have ever made...one shiny beautiful engagement ring, one triumphant Barnes, and one soon to be presumably very pleased Nikki!

A fitting end to a quality tour

Part Eleven - Toad Hall

Holland Tunnel
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
Well the tour final rolled ino NYC on Friday evening.
Final mileage just over 1700 miles (Airport to Airport).

We checked into our last hotel courtesy of the fantastic priceline.co.uk. The Millenium Hilton at ground zero finally broke the budget.

Grand total of 115 pounds a head, or 14.37 a night.
The rooms did have plasma TV screens which justified the additional 15 pounds.

Friday night's drink up was a blur, joining about a twenty wigged people from Mill New York and a few others, (including Cassie & Kev, on a romantic weekend away).

Rolled out of some eighties bar at three. I remember laying in a heap on the dancefloor.

Saturday was shopping day. Now this a story in itself more to follow, courtsey of Phil the weener.

Final Thought.
Tour a huge success. Very knackering, but "you only get one life, might as well tear the arse out of it".

Friday, October 08, 2004

Part Ten- More Rum

Fantastic Nightout.

Few beers at Adam & Morgan.

Arrived about one hour before gig.

Had photo taken with Steve Hogarth, friendly & approachable as ever.
Photo coming as soon as Phillis gets his finger out.

Promised I'd mention millions of people, including Chuck, his mate, (from Virginia),
Karen (with an "I"), with her fellow Shane, and numerous others.


barnes - Mr. Yoooreds loved it/
As did the Badger.
The Doc soaked up the Sounds.
Phillis the Weener, "Appreciated it". but would have preferred, "Justin Timberlake". What a Tit!.

Photo of Us with Steve H to follow.

Thursday, October 07, 2004

Part nine - tank empty

Outside the White House
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
The boys are flagging, but the last fuel left in the tanks will be used up in the next 3-4 hours. marillion are in town.

Full review to follow.

barnes in tears
Badger in tears
Doc converted and in awe.
Phil. Stubborn, grumpy sod.

All hail marillion.

Part Eight - In the Army now

Lincoln monument
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
Short blast from Richmond to the American capital. After 7 days on the road the van resembles a mobile skip (photos to follow).

Step up in class of hotel, they sell Krispy Kreme doughnuts in the lobby. Spenta pointless hour on a tour bus which didn't go anywhere. So got off and did Washington inside 2 hrs - White House, Lincoln Memorial, grave of JFK and the Status Quo "In the Army now' monument.

Now, after 1400 miles, we prepare ourselves for tonight's entertainment - the 'climax' of the trip - Marillion, live in concert -the Marbles tour.

New York tommorrow.

PS. Phil waxes his chest

Part Seven - Morecombe & Wise

mmmmmmm doughnuts
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
Arrived in Savannah, got changed an headed downtown.
"Your Not Gay Are You?" Raged the cab driver, as we pissed our selves laughing in the back.

A few beers, Oysters, and more Captain Morgan's later and The Bagder is chasing everyone around the Motel with icebucket to the Tour Tune, "Mah Na Mah Na" by Benny Hill.

Up next day feeling rotten. One box of Dunkin Doughnuts later and time for a quick 450 mile drive across three states to Richmond, Virginia.

Van banter is good and the four very tired tourists arrive, eat at a Greek Seafood place opposite our Comfort Inn.

Night out in Richmond was loud due to Live Band & Kareoke Machine in the two bars. Hit the high score on the Pyramid Quiz Machine, before we hit the sack, early (12.3Oam). One room, two beds . barnes & Doc - Top to Toe. Weener & Badger - Morecombe & Wise

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Part Six: The Height of Orlando Fashion

The Height of Orlando Fashion
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
...Having spent the majority of the morning scared out of our wits we spent the rest of the afternoon offending Universal Studios security and any passers by, by wearing these vests, We also shit ourselves on all of the rides. The adrenalin flowed through our veins into the night as we sustained major 'Hurricane' damage, which is four parts rum 1 part fruit punch...
We woke up feeling and looking like a Cayman Island Hut..and took one small step for mankind (after a Cracker Barrel breakfast) to Kennedy Space Center, where Barnes stared in awe at the rows of enormous phalluses before him...then he went to look at some rockets...
After that we had Georgia on our mind, onward and upward to Savannah...

Part Five - Telephone box / Rocket

Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
The regular workouts at the treadmill are evident bar one... Barnes recieved intensive physio after this photo was taken having breathed in so much. After several death defying stunts in wet n wild: including being dropped 150ft on a waterslide,we ventured into universal studios... Click below to hear a version of "Mah Na Mah Na" by Benny Hill, after one too many Rums, Hurricanes or Vodka Jellies.
this is an audio post - click to play

Monday, October 04, 2004

Part Four - Florida Turnpike

Florida Turnpike
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.
After Breaky at Jerry's Deli, at trip to the Everglades was a huge success. Blasting around the bayou on an airboat spotting gators.

Dumped Steff off back in Miami and then headed 250 miles North on the Florida Turnpike.

Highlights of the drive. Listening to The Doc reading us food facts, playing a series of six song playlist and guess the link.

Hurricane damage the whole way from Miami to Orlando.

Dip in pool & Jacuzzi. Cajun Chicken an few beers at "The House of Blues". Early night.

Tommorrow. The World's biggest MacDonalds, Wet n' Wild and Universal Studios.

Part Three - Some kind of Doomsday Machine

The boys are still in bed, must be something to do with not getting in until 4/5 ish this morning. Tucking in to a foot long Subway Sub, as I type.

Last night was a huge success, as the four members of the English "Drink while you think - MALCOLM MUGGERAGE" game, beat the one member of the New Zealand team (Steff) Live at Hooters. Miami. Florida

50 Chicken wings, 10 Buffalo Strips, two mountains of Curly Fries and six Jugs of Beer later, Steff wobbled out of the door.

Heading on an Everglade Eco-Friendly Airboat/Gator trip today before the four hour drive to Orlando.

Message for anyone in New York.
The ten venue NEW YORK PUBCRAWL starts at Toad Hall, (corner of West Broadway) at 8pm Prompt. On Friday 8th October 2004. Feel free to join in. Bring a wig.

more photos http://photos.fotango.com/cgi-bin/vpi.cgi?S_ID=290715&P_W=77445

Part Two - Captain Morgan

Miami Beach
Originally uploaded by yoooreds.

The tourists have arrived live and well in Miami.

Steff has blown in from New York and we have discovered Captain Morgan's Rum.
O dear.

this is an audio post - click to play

Day spent in the Keys catching the sun and wandering around fishing superstores.
Bubba 's Shrimp was excellent.

Grits count 1
Rum count Very high.
Pedometer broke.

making an effort tonight.

Loud shirts to be worn
Hooters for Dinner in an hour.

Next stop "LIVE & LET DIE" style fan boat, gators and Orlando.

Saturday, September 25, 2004

Part One. Preparation.

With less than one week to go before departure, plans, rules and itineries are beginning to form.

There are 5 confirmed Tourists.

The Doc
Hurricane Humphries
Phillis The Weener
The Badger
and Me.

Additional Tourist, Steff, has been half heartedly discussing with Phillis, "Guest Joining" the tour for a weekend in Florida.

As usual limited luggage rules apply.
A "Tesco's Bag For Life". MUST contain all clothes not worn on the plane.

The accomodation budget of £12.50 a head a night, seems fine. We may even have change leftover for a few beers, when we hit our final destination. THE EAR BAR. New York City.

Tour Tape/CD is almost finished. to be published on itunes ( imix ) shortly. Also expect a LIVE FROM THE VAN recording, each day. A little like this...
this is an audio post - click to play

Itineries So Far.
1st October - 9th October

Friday - Miami, Fl
Saturday - Miami, Fl
Sunday - Orlando, Fl
Monday -
Tuesday- Savannah, Georgia
Wednesday - Blue Ridge Mountains, Virginia
Thursday - Washington DC. MARILLION NIGHT. Marbles World Tour 2004.
Friday - New York, NY
Saturday - Aeroplane.

No Dieting on Tour.
No excessive sleeping.
"Van time is Banter Time".
No "Nigel Nextstepping".

THE SHIP"S LOG. The Doc's prime responsiblity.
Maintaining a good average speed. 10-15% quicker than Mapquest.com. Stopwatch & charts to be provided
No driving at night.
Making sure that we eat at regular times
Breakfast between 9-10am. To included Grits.
Lunch between 1-2pm. Different burger chain. All We Be logged and reviewed

Hurricane Humphries, might think that he can get off lightly, but he is in charge of all things social.
With the use of Google local, Tripadvisor.com and numerous guidebooks, he must organise our evening entertainments.
His brief is clear.
He should bare in mind the following. Pool tables, Live music, pub crawl, jukebox, Ribs, No cover charge.

Phillis the Weener will be in charge of tour T-shirts/vests, though he perhaps doesn't know it yet. (Si feel free to design away). X-large please.

Badger will turn up, with his bad hairdo, and be his dependable self. Of course he will spend a lot of time driving and sniggering at the banter in the van.

Initial Tour Comments. The Doc has been very quiet. Is he thinking Wedding Bells??

Vested Monkey Tour 2003

The Vested Monkey 2003.
Location. Golden Gate Bridge Car Park. San Francisco.

L to R.
Chocky Dog
Phillis The Weener
The Badger
& Me.